my mind is just so confused now....been having these fearful thots of my boyfriend...
how our phone calls are getting silent... IS IT NORMAL??? to have silent phone calls?
It's not like we have this problem when we are talking face to face.. but it's just like when we call each other over the phone...
SILENCE....he ends up playing his playstation, me... just stoning n wondering why he called...
I want us to last... for once, i want my relationship to last... dear god... is that just too much to ask for?

Well well.... stuck in my room again... trying to get some networking information into my brain... there seems to be this HUGE block obstructing that flow of information.. Either i'm stupid or something... but I really can't seem to get anything into my HUGE but really EMPTY brain. ARGH!!!! frustrating isn't it? What makes things worst is that I keep getting disconnecting from ICQ and when you live in a hostel without a phone.. ICQ is VERY IMPORTANT!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~~!!!!

Today it rains... went for a job interview this morning. I thought it went quite well. In another week's time, My exams would have ended already. FINALLY, the semester ends. Well, something has happened in these past few days. I seemed to have drifted away from the group of friends that i have been hanging out with. Especially the girls... Darren, one of the guysm, says that it is most probably because i'm attached. And that it's natural. What crap..! I don't think it's fair. It's not as though i never made an effort to go out with them. It's not like i have gave them up to spend time with my boyfriend. They simply left me out. Well, i was thinking of celebrating my 21st birthday this year with them. But... i guess i changed my mind. I rather save the money... i will just have something small.
It's sad you know. That i don't really have many friends. Ever since from young. There are times when i just feel all alone. Either that or feel like i'm stuck in a group of superficial friends. People who don't care a shit about how you really are. They just think being in your company is 'cool' Stucks!

It's a really hot day today. Wish i was stuck up on the north pole or something. Well, was watching survivor two days ago. Funny how it gets you all addicted to it. To see how a group of people can actually live together yet hold in the mind the constant thought of who they should vote off next. Well, my favourite survivor is, of cos, Elisabeth. She's so sweet and cute.. but oh well, one thing about her is that she's a really shrewd competitor. I guess the most native looking one is most probably the most cunning one.
Well, I have an exam paper tomorrow. Better get back to my books now.

Today is the first day I will start this blog. Seems like awfully bad timing since my exams are in a week's time. Well, I guess my mind's swimming with thoughts. Just wanted to put them down and share them with the world. Just wrote an essay on how people can get personal with weblogs. Well, looks like I'm going to try this out for myself afterall.
Today is the start of another week. Another boring week. I guess not much is going to happen to me today, since i'm stuck in a roomful of books that i'm supposed to read. *sighz* The life of a student. Horrid isn't it? I was thinking about what I am eventually going to do with this degree that i'm studying so hard to get. Guess what? I don't know. I have absolutely no idea why I am studying so hard for. (Perhaps besides the fact the with it i'm going to earn much more money. ) But is this how it is supposed to be? I am always wondering why I am in such an unhappy position. Is studying meant to be such a horrendous process?